Behold the King of the mic – Source: World Wrestling Entertainment
This week’s episode of Smackdown started with Triple H coming to the ring and once again claiming to be a good, fair guy. The Miz came out to challenge him on it, but was brutally buried. He did pretty good verbally and laid a few stinging barbs in the old lion, but Hunter was just too hilariously condescending to be beaten. He gave Miz the “opportunity” at a rematch with Randy Orton, for the main event!
Alberto Del Rio v R-Truth: This was a decent match. Del Rio pinned him after a savage kick to the head. He saw some blood coming from his own mouth and, in a blind rage, decided to lay the cross armbreaker on him after the bell. Rob Van Dam came to make the save, and used a steel chair for an innovative attack. He celebrated with the title belt. It’s a shame he won’t actually be winning it, and I’m not being sarcastic. Triple H was backstage with Vickie afterwards and decided to make the Battleground match a Hardcore Rules affair. That was pretty awesome, and fits in well with the regime’s recent strategy of booking matches that appear to favour babyfaces in order to distract the crowd from their insidious, evil agenda.
Prime Time Players v Real Americans: A good tag team match here. The fans really love the “million dollar dance” but they also love “We the people” so I guess it was a split crowd. The highlight of this match (and probably the entire night performance wise) saw Antonio Cesaro bring out the giant swing again, but this time on the behemoth Titus O’Neill – insanely impressive! JBL’s flabbergasted reaction summed it up well. When Young got the hot tag, he put in another particularly impressive performance, but ended up tapping out to the ankle lock of Swagger. The tag division is actually starting to take some decent shape (despite popular opinion) but the guys could do with a bit more time, and they definitely need to be featured on pay-per-view more.
Bray Wyatt v Zack Ryder: This was another disappointing placement on the card for the family. Ryder got some minimal offence in but Bray squashed him pretty quick, not literally.
Dolph Ziggler v Dean Ambrose: Kofi and Van Dam were at ringside for this one to even up the numbers. There was plenty of fast, exciting action in this short-lived fight, but the referee called it off after they all got into a brawl on the outside. Shockingly, Tag Team Trips came out and booked the inevitable six man tag.
Dolph Ziggler, Kofi Kingston & Rob Van Dam v The Shield: This was a very exciting, well executed middle match, which ended with a flurry of signature moves and Kofi eventually losing to Ambrose, after Rollins hit his trademark foot stomp.
An impassioned Big Show gave another tragic crying performance during a backstage interview, but was interrupted by Hunter. He got right in his face to gloat and goad him – so funny! He even mocked his crying. I love this whole position Big Show is in, regardless of the lack of logic to it.
Jim Duggan and The Barbarian faced off in the Vault match. Fuck off am I sitting through that! I skipped it entirely.
AJ Lee v Cameron: Tamina accompanied AJ to the ring because apparently she is the new Big E. Incidentally, where the fuck is Big E? If you know, please leave a comment. I would love to know! It was rare to see Cameron actually having a match, and Naomi being outside. She got clotheslined to hell out there by the dominant Tamina, before AJ put away her partner with the shining wizard – Really cool!
Paul Heyman was out being the sickly bragster again, to my glee. He cut a really, really awesome promo, thanked his boys Axel and Ryback, and thanked “each and every one of you” for encouraging Punk to keep falling into his traps. He made what I think was the first official mention of Ryback v Punk at Battleground. It’s been painfully obvious since the last pay-per-view but I’m pretty sure it hadn’t been announced until this point.
Santino Marella v Heath Slater: A “comedy” match involving a terrible parody rock band, a mincing fake Italian, the worst professional wrestler in the history of the business (Khali) and a midget. I skipped the whole thing. I don’t have time to waste on that.
Cole and JBL gave a really cool recap of the whole Rhodes storyline, including a really awesome excerpt from the exclusive interview Cole did with Triple H in the week. They also showed the video response from Goldust and Cody Rhodes, in which they agreed to come to Raw on Monday and hear his proposal, along with their father Dusty. I can’t wait to see what happens!
Randy Orton v The Miz: The Miz was on the attack aggressively in the early going of this main event rematch, but he hurt his shoulder on the turnbuckle. When the doctors were checking him, Randy started beating him down and the bell was inevitably rang. Hunter came out and said Orton wasn’t going to get out that easy, and in a “face” move restarted the match and made it No DQ. The look on The Viper’s face made it clear that he knew this was another veiled gift for him. He took it with both hands and mercilessly beat down the below 100% Miz, who provided little resistance but was brutally obliterated.
Notes: There was a lot of good development to further storylines in this episode, and some good Battleground build. The giant swing was another moment of insanity that leads me to believe that Cesaro must have slept with Stephanie. It’s the only explanation for his lack of being in the World Title picture. Triple H was flawless once again, carrying both weekly shows now with ease. My only concern is that there were eight matches, and none of them were really special. My suggestion would be to reduce the amount, but increase the time given. That’s just me. On the whole, a good showing from WWE. I hope you enjoyed the show too and I hope you enjoyed reading. Thank you!