Warrior Poetry: Rob Van Dam


Thanks for checking out Warrior Poetry. I’ve decided to jump back on the horse after around six years. What better way to get the juices flowing than some good old fashioned professional wrestling poetry? Sounds like a novel idea to me. I’ll be twinning the poems with awesome illustrations from Deviant Art. If you haven’t seen these before, check it out. Some amazing artwork! I hope you enjoy the poem, and please feel free to leave feedback and/or criticism in a comment below. Thank you for reading!

deviantrvdRob Van Dam – Source: Deviant Art

Rob Van Dam

The man best known for spin kicks and high knees
Also deeply fond of smoking mad trees
A hero to many, inspiration to all
Off of twenty foot ladders, he has learned to fall

In the home of chairs, canes and burning tables
He played his part in one of the game’s great fables
An extreme revolution with one shining light
For an army of misfits, he was an unarmoured knight

When Mr. Pay-Per-View arrived in the big time
His performances in the ring were typically sublime
With limited opportunities, he still made his mark
Going head to head with the pool’s biggest sharks

He showed us all that he had more in the tank
When he captured the precious money in the bank
He took John Cena out of his element
In the land of extreme, he became a champion

For a few years now, he has been gone from our screens
He’s been tearing it up, playing for the other team
But now that he’s back, we can all rejoice
The design on his ring gear, the sound of his voice

It’s about time that we got our fill of excitement
After all of these Ryback and John Cena indictments
A newly found impetus to stay in on Monday
A brand new old face to keep boredom at bay

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