The straw that broke the camel’s back
So, my earlier update today (while at work) highlighted my current mental state. To cut a very long story short, the same thing happened to me again AFTER work, only worse. I waited for 45 minutes for a bus home, while only two of the four vehicles scheduled to be passing through during that time actually arrived. Both drove straight past full to the brim with passengers. I phoned the complaints line for one last bitching session and decided I can’t do this anymore.
The ironic thing is that I’ve really started to enjoy my job recently. I’ve finally settled in and my optimism about work is at an all time high. I have recently been promoted. I now enjoy more responsibility, am involved in much more interesting projects on a regular basis and feel a lot more respect and kindness from my employer. A lot more than I would have expected a few months ago.
But sadly, for the sake of my stress levels and in turn my physical and mental health, I just can’t be wasting two to three hours of my day waiting at bus stops in vein and crawling through traffic. Tomorrow morning I’m calling my boss to resign; something I don’t look forward to one little bit. it’s going to be awful. I wish I lived next door so I didn’t have to leave because frankly, I think I’m going to miss working there, to some extent.
Nonetheless, I need to look to the future. I need to take a temporary financial hit and take a fairly big risk, in order to find an equally rewarding position in Walsall, allowing me to walk to work. I’d rather have to take my chances (which I believe from past experience to be very good) that I can find something new within a couple of weeks – than keep having semi-rage attacks every day and in turn accelerating my condition (which is heavily influenced by stress)
Tomorrow is a brand new day. A scary one. I feel a sense of liberation and freedom, along with feelings of cautious trepidation. It’s gonna start with a horrible phone call, but hopefully end with the optimism of a long day spent making the calls, sending the emails and forcing myself back into work in no time. Today was the final straw. I hope tomorrow can be the fresh beginning.